From Self-Criticism to Self-Compassion, Practical Ways to Change Your Inner Dialogue

kim Wymer
Oct 26
3 min read

How to Stop Beating Yourself Up (and Start Lifting Yourself Up)

Hello Beautiful soul,

Do you ever notice how harsh you can sometimes be with yourself?

Maybe you make a small mistake and suddenly your inner voice says things like: “You’re so stupid,” or “Why can’t you ever get it right?”

I can say this from past experience!

We can sometimes speak to ourselves in ways we would never speak to a friend. That inner critic can be loud, heavy, and upsetting.

Over time, it chips away at our confidence and joy.

But here’s the truth: self-criticism doesn’t make us stronger. It makes us smaller.

What truly lifts us is self-compassion, the simple act of treating ourselves with the same kindness we’d give to someone we love.

Self-Criticism Isn’t Helping You.

Many of us believe being hard on ourselves will keep us motivated.

But research shows the opposite, people who practice self-compassion are actually more motivated,

more resilient, and happier. Why? Because compassion fuels growth, while criticism can fuel shame.

Think of it like this: If a child was learning to walk and fell down, would you shout at them? Or would you encourage them to try again with love?

We need that same gentle encouragement for ourselves.

How to Shift from Criticism to Compassion

Here are some practical ways you can start changing your inner dialogue.

Notice Your Inner Voice

Pay attention to what you say to yourself. Awareness is the first step. When you catch a critical thought, pause and acknowledge it.

Ask: Would I Say This to a Friend?

If the answer is no, rewrite it. Speak to yourself the way you would comfort and encourage someone you love.

Use Compassionate Language

Swap “I’m such a failure” with “I’m learning, and it’s okay to make mistakes.”Swap “I’m not good enough” with “I’m growing, and I’m proud of how far I’ve come.”

Place a Hand on Your Heart

This may sound simple, but touch is grounding. Place your hand over your heart, take a breath, and say, “I am doing my best, and that is enough.”

Create a Compassionate Mantra

A short phrase you can return to when self-criticism sneaks in. For example:

“I am worthy of kindness.”

“I choose progress over perfection.”

“I am learning, and that’s beautiful.”

A Gentle Practice for This Week

Each evening, write down one thing you’re proud of from your day

No matter how small.

Maybe it was making a healthy choice, showing patience, or simply getting through a tough moment.

This daily reminder helps your brain shift from focusing on flaws to celebrating progress.

The way you speak to yourself matters.

Every kind word you give yourself builds confidence, resilience, and peace.

So next time your inner critic starts shouting, pause and ask: “What would compassion say right now?”

Remember that you are worthy of the same kindness, love, and patience that you so freely give to others.

Check out my YouTube video on this subject

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NfC2iQbOK7Q

If This Spoke to Your Heart...

If this message resonated with you, I’d love to help you continue your journey of healing and positivity. You can explore my free resources and online courses designed to guide you toward more peace, self-worth, and joy, one beautiful thought at a time.

Love and peace to you sovereign being, Our purpose is to Love and stay positive!

Kim xxx

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https://www.kimwymer.com/online-posivity-programmes

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